How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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