If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
