I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
