paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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