You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
my shit smells like andre
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize