The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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