please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize