I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Randomize
