I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
