I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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