if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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