even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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