Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
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