i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize
