"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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