a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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