I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize