guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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