I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
