I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
