you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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