The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
