What a fucking waste of an outfit
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Welp...herpes.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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