She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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