Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
