Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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