He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
