He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
I'm having to shit out rocks
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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