listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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