I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
