your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
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