so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
