2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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