WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Randomize