Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
