I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
