smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
