i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
