I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i will never coherently bang her
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize