I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize