Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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