i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize