He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
