the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
