Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
