i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
