Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
