trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Randomize
