but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
