what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
